Ahem. Please excuse my random bursts of, erm, random.
Still stuck in that b/p cycle. Really sucks. Sometimes I think I can pull myself out of my problems, sometimes I can eat without hating myself. But the pathetic, horrible thing about it is that I don't want to stop. It scares me. I don't think I'll ever feel normally about eating in front of people, especially unhealthy stuff.
Maybe, just maybe, one day I will overcome this.
You know, I think it's girls like me who really make people think EDs are "rich white girl" diseases. My family is in the mid-upper class of good 'ole America, I have a loving(smothering) family, I have had not much bullying in my life. I just have a fucked-up mind, haha(Not exactly new). I am my own biggest bully.
I was just checking my blog, and I realized that I have 11 followers. Weeeiiirrrdd. It's strange that people find me so interesting online, but offline I am a total dork. Sort of.
Welp, Easter is coming up. I feel kind of bad focusing on eating right now instead of God... Is it hypocritical to claim to love God but still do this to myself? I truly love the Lord, when I am not focusing on calories and other damn numbers.
I went through a bad cursing stage for a week, and I think I rubbed off on my younger sister. Oops.
How is everyone here? So sorry I have been so bad about checking blogs!!
<3 Wren
I hope you can break the b/p cycle soon. I can imagine it's be particularly hard over Easter.
ReplyDeletePeople find me much more interesting online than offline too. Maybe because we're so open on our blogs, and you don't really get that in day-to-day conversation.
Have a wonderful weekend dear! <3 xx
Thank you :) I think I am finally coming out of it, though.
DeleteI guess it would be strange if we just started talking about our ED to random people, huh?
I hope you do too! <3